


Little Johnlock Things

by TheCumberToMyBatch



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Cute, Fluff, Funny, Johnlock - Freeform, Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-12
Updated: 2014-08-12
Packaged: 2018-02-12 20:46:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2124153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheCumberToMyBatch/pseuds/TheCumberToMyBatch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Random, short things I wrote a while ago.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Jam and Jumpers

John woke up, ambled from his bedroom to the kitchen. If only he didn't have to go down stairs, he could sneak into Sherlock's bedroom, but he doubted that would work.

He rummaged through the cupboards, looking for his precious jam. No jam. What? NO JAM. The rage. The anger.

"SHERLOCK."

"What John?"

"WHERE THE HELL DID YOU PUT MY JAM? YOU LITTLE SHIT."

"You really do love jam, you get so angry when you don't have any."

Sherlock raised his eyebrows.

"WHY DID YOU TAKE MY JAM?"

"Why did you turn my shirt pink?"

"I didn't mean to, you dick. WHERE IS MY JAM?"

"On your jumpers." John charged up the stairs, to his room. Opened the door, barged in. "HAVE YOU HEARD OF JARS?"

"Yes John, I just thought it would be better revenge."

"SO YOU TOOK ALL MY JUMPERS AND SMOTHERED THEM IN ALL MY JAM?"

"Yes, I would of thought that fairly obvious."

"I DIDN'T MEAN TO TURN YOUR SHIRT PINK, I JUST PUT IT IN THE WASHING MACHINE WITH MY..."

"With your what, John?"

"With my red pants. HAPPY NOW SHERLOCK?"

"I wouldn't say happy, just content."

"GET THE JAM OFF MY FUCKING JUMPERS." 


	2. Revenge

Somehow John got Sherlock on a river, in the English countryside. In a raft. It was made out of 10 thin wooden planks, tied together.

It wasn't exactly... sturdy. It was a month after "the jam incident" and John was still mad at Sherlock. He had dragged Sherlock around the shopping centre while he bought himself around 20 new jumpers and, of course he went to Tesco to buy a jar of jam.

Well, a couple of jars of jam.

"JAAAAAAAAAWN WHY THE HELL DID YOU PUSH ME OFF?"

"Why did you put jam on all of my jumpers?"

"Why did you turn my shirt pink?"

"I. Didn't. Mean. To."

"You're a terrible liar, come and pull me back up."

Another splash and John was pulled in too. Sherlock quickly grasped the wood and pulled himself up onto the raft. John pushed it. Hard. It sailed down the river. Fast.

"JOOOOOOOOOHN STOP IT NOW."

"I can't."

"John help."

"Nope."

"John I forgot how to swim."

"You swam like two minutes ago."

"Yeah, but I deleted it."

"IN TWO MINUTES?"

"Yes."

Sherlock was 10 meters away from John now. The raft had got stuck on an overhanging branch. John got out of the river and walked down to Sherlock.

"Why did we even do this?"

"Because I pushed the raft down the river, because you pulled me in, because I pushed you in, because you stole my jumpers and jam, and put jam on it, because I accidentally turned your shirt pink."

"O..kay?" 


	3. Texts

John, is the toaster meant to be on fire? -SH

Bloody hell, Sherlock. What experiment were you doing this time? -JW

I was just making toast. -SH

Why? -JW

Am I not allowed to make toast? -SH

No, it's just you don't eat very often, and when you do it's normally take away. -JW

I was making the toast for you. -SH

Thank you Sherlock, that's very... Thoughtful of you. -JW

So you would come home from work. -SH

Sherlock, we've been over this, I won't come home until my shift ends. -JW

It has ended. -SH

What? No, I have another hour. -JW

Oh God, you asked Mycroft again didn't you. -JW

Maybe... -SH  

How exactly were you making the toast that set the toaster on fire? -JW

I believe I put the butter on too soon. -SH

You didn't... -JW

Yes, I put the butter on before I put the bread on the toaster. -SH

It's like the Earth going round the Sun again. -JW

Oh, not that again. - SH

                    (•_•)

John? -SH

I'm at work. -JW

I knew that. -SH

I would have assumed you did. -JW

Will you marry me? -SH

What? -JW

Is that not what people do? -SH

Did I ask the wrong question? -SH

What people do when? -JW

When they 'like' people. -SH

Like like, or just like. -JW

What? -SH

Never mind. -JW

So you... like me. As more than a friend? -JW

I believe so. -SH

Why did you ask me to marry you? -JW

I just explained, you're so slow. -SH

You asked me to marry you because you liked me? -JW

Yes. -SH

Sherlock that's not what people do. -JW

You don't just get married, we haven't even gone on a date. -JW

Do you... want to go on a date with me? -SH

Yes. -JW

Where do people go on dates? -SH

Ask Mycroft. -JW

How would he know? -SH

He's going out with Greg. -JW

How didn't I deduce that and you saw it? -SH

I believe you were too busy thinking about me. -JW

You're not very modest. -SH

Not today. -JW

Why not? -SH

Because I'm falling in love with Sherlock Holmes. -JW


End file.
